Love and Peace
by max3833
Summary: Naruto has spent his entire life being prepared for war and murder. That was until the night of the Mizuki incident. Now, with the power of the Human Typhoon, Naruto is about to show that the ninja world is really made of..."Love And PEACE!"
1. A Ninja Pacifist

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Trigun.

Now…

Max3833 presents…

Naruto: Love and Peace!

* * *

Kakashi really hated his job.

Well, to be more accurate, he really hated this part of the job. He hated that every six months; another team of genin would be given to him to fail, and then getting chewed out because no new Team Seven was being produced. After that, he would wait another six months of cool fights and then begin the cycle again. Of course, the council would not stop until he finally trained Sasuke Uchiha, and the old man had been asking for him to take care of his teacher's son, so he was kind of forced into it once again. Maybe if he failed this group, he could finally get a dismissal from testing teams.

You see, Kakashi had an unusual style when it came to genin. Due to the death of his best friend, an Uchiha whose eye he now owned, he would not allow anyone to pass the test unless they proved themselves as capable to work as a team. Of course, one major problem with this is that he never tells his teams this, thus they are more likely to fail outright because they have no idea what his test is actually about.

In all honesty, the student who interested him most was Naruto Uzumaki. It didn't take a brain surgeon, which he was qualified as, to know that he and the Fourth Hokage were related. He being the student of said deceased leader felt a certain obligation to at least give the pariah a chance at following his father's footsteps.

This did not seem likely though, as from what he heard of the boy, Naruto was a loud, knuckleheaded boy, who barely scraped by a passing grade. Even more so, no one his age seemed to be that friendly towards him, so the possibility of him working with the others was low. It was truly sad that the boy was kept from reaching his potential; the town's fear of his guest was passed on to the next generation, which continued the tradition of keeping distance from him.

As he opened the door to the stairwell, he remembered the odd conversation with Iruka Umino, Naruto's teacher. You see after Naruto failed his third attempt, a traitor in the village, Mizuki, convinced Naruto that he could pass if he stole the Great Scroll of Sealing. How Naruto managed to actually steal the scroll was beyond Kakashi, but nevertheless, Iruka caught up Naruto about the same time Mizuki did.

To make a long story short, Naruto beat up Mizuki, and earned his place as a ninja of Konoha. What surprised him even more, as he opened the door to the classroom where his team was waiting, was that apparently something happened to Naruto, which changed him. Iruka appeared to have been freaked out, so he would have to keep an eye on the boy. He saw that he had finally reached the door to the classroom.

He calmly looked down at his watch, and noticed that it was three. Ha, six hours late. The little bastards might actually have left by now. Would have made his day. Kakashi calmly poked his head through the door, and sighed as he saw three figures sitting in their desks. So much for the easy way, now things were going to get rough.

"You're late!" the girl cried, pointing angrily at him. She had long pink hair, with a red dress and blue pats underneath. The girl is Sakura Haruno, the kunochi of the team, and the greatest academic of the academy. Kakashi simply rolled his eyes at her, book smarts would not save her on the battlefield.

"Good to see you all," Kakashi said, as he moved his attention to a boy with deep black hair, a blue shirt, and a distinctly negative looking scowl. That must be Sasuke Uchiha, the rookie of the year, and considered the only hope of rebuilding the once illustrious Uchiha clan. It was kind of sad to see him with a scowl. He had really wanted the chance to possibly make up for his mistake with Obito. Now it looked like he might not ever get the chance.

"My first impression of you all is…" he looked over at the final member of the team. From what rumors he had heard of the boy, there appeared to be no obvious change to him. Sure, he was sitting silently, but after six hours, many would give up and just be grateful for the late person to arrive. His spikey blonde hair remained, as did his large black whisker scars.

The only great change was his jacket. Instead of the well-known orange which he was famous for, a long red coat nearly completely covered his body. It also appeared that a long black jumpsuit was underneath it, as both his arms and legs were covered in black. Finally, the last major addition was a pair of orange sunglasses, shining back Kakashi's reflection.

'Trying to be cool eh?' Kakashi thought to himself, 'Probably thinks that a "badass" coat and sunglasses makes him cool. Might as well take him down a peg. I don't usually have this much fun with mind games when Gai isn't around.'

"That I hate you." Sakura glared even larger daggers into his skull, and was joined by Sasuke, who appeared to have inherited the Uchiha glare. Naruto however, did not appear to be phased at all.

'Hm,' Kakashi inwardly scratched his head, 'Maybe he really has changed.'

At that exact instant, Naruto leaned back too far in his chair, and came crashing to the floor. Sputtering, his sunglasses now sitting on his neck, he looked up, and blinked rather stupidly.

"Oh, you're here sensei," he said rather politely.

"You were sleeping weren't you?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"…My second impression is that all of you are morons."

Sakura and Sasuke turned their evil glares to their blonde teammate. He smirked under his mask as he saw Naruto freaking out about how angry the other two were acting. This might actually be kind of fun.

"Meet me on the top of the roof in ten minutes."

In a flash, he disappeared in a puff of smoke. The three simply stared at where he stood, before quietly getting up. Naruto calmly began to open the door, only for a small eraser to fall on his head. Stupid thing hadn't gone off for over a year. Guess that's karma for ya, likes to bite your ass whenever you decide to change yourself.

* * *

"Okay," Kakashi said as he sat down on a seat, as the three genin sat on a bench in front of a large opening to the sky, "Why don't you tell me about yourselves."

"We don't know how to do that sensei," Sakura stated with hand raised, "Could you give us an example."

"Okay, let's try likes, dislikes, dreams, hobbies," Kakashi's eye suddenly closed in an infamous eye-smile, "I am Kakashi Hatake, I like avoiding talking about my likes, I dislike talking about my dislikes, I dream of never speaking of my dreams." He then brought a small orange book that was well known as soft core smut, "I have several hobbies."

'He didn't tell us a single thing,' Sakura thought, before coughing and beginning.

"My name is Sakura Haruno, I like studying, writing and a very special boy," she gave a small glance to Sasuke, "I dislike Ino-pig and other lazy, good-for-nothing blondes," she turned her glare to Naruto, who did not appear fazed by in behind his glasses, "My dream is to get married to that special boy, and my main hobby is studying."

'Great,' Kakashi thought, 'Not only is she a fan-girl, she hates her other teammate. If they actually pass, like that will ever happen, that could be a problem.'

"Okay, dark guy, your next."

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha," the boy began darkly, "I don't have many things that I particularly like, though I do have many," he glared at Sakura, and then at Naruto, "Many dislikes. Neither hobbies or dreams are not on my radar, but I do have an ambition," he glared at Kakashi, a show of determination, "I want to kill a certain man."

'Yep,' Kakashi thought, 'He's after his brother. If only he hadn't been there that night, maybe his great potential wouldn't be wasted on this revenge. I need to help him get over this. Then maybe I will have repaid my debt to Obito.'

"Okay blonde, your turn," Kakashi turned to see Naruto silent, "Well, aren't you going to introduce yourself?"

"Meow"

The three turned to see a black cat walking across the roof. It had large green eyes, triangle ears, and a twisted tail. It calmly jumped off the roof, and onto Naruto's head, knocking the boy onto the floor, sputtering like before. The cat fell to the street, hitting a thirty year old man in the head. That guy with the glasses glared, before recoiling in fear.

"Cat!" He screamed as he ran down the street, away from Kuroneko-sama.

"You fell asleep again!" Sakura shouted, seriously wanting to strangle the boy for causing them to lose even more dignity in the eyes of their sensei. Though secretly Kakashi was enjoying it, he would never give them that satisfaction.

"Well now that you have had your nap," Kakashi said, "Would you please introduce yourself?"

"Of course," Naruto smiled, as he pulled his sunglasses off and put them away, "My Name is Naruto Uzumaki. I like sunny days, ramen, donuts and mankind in general. I hate unnecessary violence," he said this while holding his hands up defensively in front of Sakura, "and people who take joy from violence. My hobbies include eating, singing, drinking, sleeping and reading while doing any of the previous others."

'At least he seems to have calmed down,' Kakashi mulled in his mind, before saying, "Please continue with your dream."

Naruto's eyes suddenly sharpened, giving them a sharp point, actually shocking Kakashi as he said, "I have only one dream. It's gonna be real hard, but I think the world needs a guy to do this," he and Kakashi made I contact, "I want to save everyone."

"What do you mean?" Kakashi asked, noting vaguely this how different it was from the Hokage dream he had so often.

"I want to make sure that where ever I am," Naruto's smile got bigger, "Nobody dies. Allies, friends, enemies, anybody, I want to see that no one is ever killed when I am around."

Kakashi almost felt heartbroken. This kid was a pacifist, the exact opposite of what a ninja should be. This kid had chosen the wrong profession if that was his desire. This was not at all what he would expect from the Fox container, but it only made his situation sadder. He was too noble to be a ninja, and Kakashi could only hope that he never made it to the battlefield.

'So I have a fan-girl, an avenger, and a pacifist,' Kakashi sighed, 'This team was done before it even started the test.'

"Okay," Kakashi said, eye smiling at them, "That's good for today, tomorrow we will meet at training ground seven."

"So what's our first mission?" Sasuke asked eagerly, desiring to begin his ninja career.

"We will be doing survival training."

"But sensei," Sakura noted with confusion, "We already did that in the academy."

"Yes," Kakashi said with almost sadistic glee, "But this is different. This test is about the survival of your ninja careers."

"What?" All three shouted horror over all their faces.

"That's right," Kakashi explained, "On average, only three out of every shinobi that graduate the academy actually make the grade in the true test. Those who fail are sent straight back to the academy."

As the three looked at one another in fear, Kakashi eye-smiled, "Meet me at training ground seven tomorrow at seven for the test. Oh yeah," he turned back to them as he was leaving, "don't eat, cause you will probably throw up."

* * *

**Omake!**

Title: The Guy in the Glasses.

Ah, what a day. Living in a ninja village was a really great life. Cheap houses, good food, and a rich group of writers who beg for his well know critical analysis. Yes nothing could possibly go wrong.

"Meow!"

"Cat!"

And thus we have established our running gag.

* * *

Chapter 1 over!

Yes! I am back! And doing an actual, serious, new fiction. Now don't get me wrong, I love my originals, like Worlds Collide and Noah the Schemer, but…I no longer enjoy that series, and have moved on.

The reasons why are an interesting story. See, when I last updated, about six months ago, I was just about to undergo what we high school seniors term as hell. I speak of course about college essays. I applied to 14 schools(Yes I know, I am a masochist) and thus had not energy to write anything for the site. So instead, I devoted myself to another website, That Guy with the Glasses. Now, as much as I do love Nostalgia Critic, my favorite person on the site is JesuOtaku. She was not only really enjoyable, but very analytical and fair. Thus, my entire list of favorite anime has been shaken considerably, with Trigun now on top.

Naruto, once number 3 on my list, is no longer in the top 10. But I think that Naruto's lack of strength actually makes it great for fan fiction. Naruto has so many things good about it, it should be a masterpiece, but Kishimoto, like Rowling, can do stupid things to throw the story off track. Now, I do not hate the writer, he still came up with the ideas and characters, and I personally think that he does follow the all-important-CROWNING MOMENT OF AWESOME BEFORE DEATH-rule.

But he just tries too hard sometimes. Which make Naruto great for fanfiction, cause we can make very good stories from it, much more than any other series in the world. Yes, even Harry Potter.

So yeah, I love Trigun and Naruto, so I made this. Hope you enjoy it, and if this gets enough reviews asking for one of my other fics, I might work on those next.

Until next time…Sayonara bye bye!


	2. The Bells and Knives

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Trigun.

Now…

Max3833 presents…

Naruto: Love and Peace!

* * *

Hello, I am Naruto Uzumaki. Today I am waking up for my first ninja exam. If I pass this, I will really be a ninja. This would have mattered a lot more before I met Vash and changed my dream from being Hokage to something greater.

Or is it that I have become Vash? Meh, that is a question for later.

Now, I start the day by meditating on my bed. The topics of my meditation are life and love.

I quit after three seconds.

I then grab my outfit, and walk out the door. I calmly begin looking around. I notice that I am hungry. As usual, I walk to the nearest small shop. Taking out my wallet, I cheerfully greet the lady working at the counter. After a small exchange, I pay 500 ryo for a box of donuts, honey-glazed of course, and walk to my team's rendezvous point. Ah, nothing like a good breakfast of fried dough to get you ready for the day.

* * *

"What the heck are you doing!"

Naruto was crying as he watched his box of donuts, only three eaten, tumble into the creek below. They had been sent on their trip by an angry fist from Sakura. Luckily he had saved a second box of jelly donuts in his pack.

"You're an hour late!" she shouted, "What the heck is wrong with you! You could have gotten us in trouble for being late!"

"I'm sorry," Naruto said with hands raised in defense, "But since Sensei isn't here, can't we let bygones be bygones?"

POW!

* * *

Kakashi arrived to find all of his students in place. Sasuke was resting in a tree, glaring at his surroundings. It wouldn't surprise him at all if Sasuke had already set up some traps to help him win this test.

Sakura was glaring at him from her seat on a post, obviously angry at him for being late. It would be easy enough to deal with her in an aggravated state. Just get her on her own and take her out quick.

"Hey," Kakashi looked around for his third subordinate, "Where's Naruto?"

"Over here," he heard Naruto groan weakly. He turned to see Naruto stuck in a tree, his eyes twirling with pain.

"What happened?" Kakashi asked with actual wonder. Naruto looked over his teacher's shoulder to see Sakura threatening him with a fist. He gulped and turned back to Kakashi.

"I slipped while running here."

"…Maybe you should be more careful."

* * *

After successfully removing Naruto from the tree, which took about ten minutes, Kakashi simply sat all three down and began to explain the test. He calmly took two bells out of his pocket, both attached to string, and hung them in front of the preteens/

"Your mission is to steal these bells from me," he suddenly noticed that his hand was lighter, looked down, and saw both bells already missing, and in Naruto's hands. A quick bop on the head, and they were both back in his hands.

"Now as I was saying," he calmly glared at the blonde, "You will steal these bells from me when I say go," Naruto nodded with understanding, not wishing to withstand more head trauma today, "If you can capture a bell by noon, then I will allow you to become a ninja of the Leaf. If you fail, you go back to the academy, and," he then motioned his head to the three pieces of wood sticking out of the ground behind them, "I will tie you up and leave you with no lunch."

"But sensei," Sakura said with hand raised, "There are only two bells."

"Right," Kakashi said, "Only two of you will pass. So no matter what, one of you will return to the academy, and will be tied up to the post."

"You have ten seconds before we…" he inwardly sighed as all three disappeared into the woods.

'Guess it was too much to suspect that one of them would be stupid enough to take me head…I spoke to soon,' Kakashi was exacerbated as he saw a long red jacket standing in front of the creek that ran through the training ground. Naruto was standing him down, with sunglasses and serious face covering his visage, apparently calling him for a showdown.

"You are an odd one," Kakashi commented, "I thought you didn't want to fight anyone."

"Who says I need to fight," Naruto replied confidently, before smiling, "Now please, may I have a bell?"

"No."

"WHAT!" Naruto shouted aghast, "Isn't this supposed to be some test of creativity and recognizing that there are many ways to complete a mission." From there positions, Sakura and Sasuke were both recovering from a face fault, growling about the stupidity of their teammate.

"Why would you think that?"

"Aren't ninja supposed to think on their feet, and be able to come up with different styles to suit each individual case and best adapt. So I obviously thought that the test was a test of creativity and recognition of taking different avenues, thus I thought by asking, I would be taking the least obvious route, and win in the end."

"There is some logic in that," Kakashi admitted, before steeling his glance, "But that is not how ninja operate."

He then, chuckling to himself, reached into his pocket, and calmly pulled out his Icha Icha. 'This ought to get the kid riled up,' he thought to himself. He brought his eyes up again only to see Naruto smiling.

"Oh," Naruto said with a look of realization, "We're on break," he then reached into his bag, and pulled out his box of jelly donuts, "perfect time to scarf a few of these down."

"We're not on break," Kakashi groaned. There was no way he could really be this stupid was there?

"Well you are just reading a book, so obviously you want to have a time out."

Apparently, he is that stupid.

"I'm trying to insult your skills by saying I could beat you while reading porn."

"Oh," Naruto said, while quietly taking a bite of one of his donuts. Of course, by taking a bite of one side of the donut, it forced a hole to appear on the other side of the donut. This caused the jelly to fly over the field and land on the cover of the porn book that Kakashi was holding. Kakashi slowly looked down at the book, his eye seeming to be still not comprehending what just happened.

"Oops."

* * *

Sasuke's sweat drop grew bigger each second, as Kakashi, who was only one moment before coolly trying to rile up Naruto, was now chasing the boy in red all across the field. And all because Naruto had simply spilled jelly over Kakashi's book.

How was this guy supposed to be teaching them again?

'Darn it,' Naruto thought, 'Kakashi-sensei is starting to catch up to me. If he actually gets to me, I'm dead," he then suddenly lifted his eyes, and noticed a small circle in the grass underneath a tree. He suddenly smiled, and thus turned his run towards the tree.

"I'll get you for ruining my Icha Icha!" Kakashi shouted, not noticing Naruto swiftly hopping near the tree. At least until it was too late.

SNAP!

'I can't believe I fell for that,' Kakashi inwardly thought, hanging from his own rope snare ten feet above the ground, 'Guess that is another check mark in the genius column. Maybe I underestimated him'. He quietly groaned as Naruto walked up and smirked at the hanging scarecrow.

"You really need to be more careful sensei. This is a wooded area, so some hunters were bound to have left some traps lying around near the trees," Naruto said confidently. Kakashi sweat dropped.

'He doesn't know I laid the snare?' Kakashi balked, 'Another mark in the idiot column.'

"Oh look," Naruto suddenly pointed at the ground under Kakashi, where a small bell was sitting in the grass, "I guess you dropped it when you were grabbed up," He did not notice another circle right around that bell.

SNAP!

'And…idiot,' Kakashi commented in his head. Naruto rubbed his head as he two hung from his ankle, simply having eye contact with his sensei.

"Well at least we're in the same situation," Naruto chuckled, while Kakashi calmly brought his hands together.

"Substitution Jutsu!"

Kakashi suddenly was covered in a cloud of smoke. As Naruto calmly waved the smoke away, to see a log held up in the rope. He then turned to see Kakashi walk out of the woods, and calmly walk up, and grab up the bell.

"You certainly are full of surprises," Kakashi almost laughed, "But you might need to not fall for obvious traps."

"Well," Suddenly, a blade extended from Naruto's boot, and with one swift kick, he slices apart the branch which the rope holding him was tied to, and twists onto his feet as he lands on the ground. He smirks smartly, until the branch lands on his head, causing him to fall down.

'I don't know whether to be impressed by his preparation,' Kakashi thought with a sweat drop flowing off his head, 'or mock him for a lack of aim.'

"That hurt," Naruto groaned, before turning back to his tester, "So, what did you think?" to see Kakashi no longer standing there.

* * *

"So what did you think," Sasuke turned to see Kakashi standing on a branch right above his head.

"He's at least not useless," Sasuke admitted begrudgingly, "Definitely not the dead-last punk who I thought he was."

"But," Kakashi egged on.

"But he is possibly worse now," Sasuke growled, "Death is an aspect that all ninja must deal with in this profession. Declaring that you are a pacifist will only get you killed," Sasuke also glared fiercely into the ground, "It will also keep me from my goal."

"To kill Itachi?"

Sasuke stared up in surprise.

"No need to act so offended," Kakashi chuckled, before jumping to the ground, "Now let's see how you do."

* * *

"I can't believe I haven't found sensei," Naruto sighed, "I've searched an hour, and the test is almost over."

He calmly walked into the field with the logs, where they were supposed to meet after the test was over, and calmly sat down on a stump right across from the three central logs. He calmly began to think about his strategy.

'Kakashi is much stronger than I thought,' Naruto admitted, 'I don't want to reveal my cards to him yet. I don't know how I would explain a gun to them. I don't even know if we ninja can make gun powder.'

Suddenly, he heard a small click, and smiled.

'O, fireworks run on them, thanks Vash,' he thought spoke, 'but that still doesn't help with this bell problem,' there was another click, 'What do you mean his porn?'

"Hey Naruto," Naruto's eyes widened, as he turned to see Sakura walking out of the bushes, "Have you seen Sasuke?"

"That explains the weird muffled noise coming from this stump I don't remember being here before," Naruto answered, and stood up, showing a very mortified Sasuke. Or more accurately, Sasuke's head sticking out of the ground.

"NARUTO!"

* * *

Kakashi walked back to the poles again, only to find Naruto lying on the ground in with a large knot on his head, Sasuke sitting angrily on one of the stumps, and Sakura glaring at the blonde boy lying on the ground.

"Come on," Kakashi sighed, "Don't tell me you guys have given up. You still have five minutes."

"But we've already been beaten by you," Sakura sighed, "Sasuke couldn't even handle you in a one-on-one fight, so what chance would me or Naruto have against you."

"Well if you all want to give up, I guess I have to tie Sakura to that log over there," Sakura took a step back for a second, "I was hoping to do that to Naruto, but…" he suddenly noticed the bloody pile on the ground was gone, and could hear a small chink from behind. He turned to see that Naruto had deployed his boot-knife, and was aiming for his side.

On instinct, Kakashi turned so that Naruto would miss. After this reaction however, he remembered that side of him was the side that bells were tied to. He also remembered that Naruto would never actually stab him in the gut, as that would probably be lethal.

And thus, as Naruto caught both bells in his hands, he turned to see Kakashi reaching out to grab him. Not wanting to return the bells, Naruto threw the two pieces of metal over Kakashi's head. They just so happened to land in the hands of Sakura and Sasuke, who looked down in shock. Kakashi just stared at him dumbfounded.

"CRAP!"

* * *

"So you lost," Iruka chuckled at his friend. Kakashi glared at the younger man, seriously wishing that he could impale him with a spike. He had just revealed to the entire village that he had actually lost the bell trial. The worst part was that the three, even Naruto, didn't actually learn the teamwork lesson, only that you should adapt to different challenges in different ways.

"I still can't believe that the pacifist is the one who actually beat me," Kakashi sighed, before seriously looking at Iruka, "Why wasn't I informed of his pacifism."

"To tell you the truth," Iruka looked down cast, "That came about because of his extra credit."

"Oh," Kakashi said with eyes open, remembering the Mizuki incident, "That would explain why it wasn't on record."

"I say we just let Naruto realize he can't accomplish his goal," Iruka tried to offer; "He will just reject our teachings if we try and force him. Eventually, he will come to realize that killing is part of being a ninja."

* * *

"_You are the Nine-Tailed Fox!"_

"_No! Naruto!"_

"_Please don't ever lay a hand on my sensei, can't we work this out?"_

"_You are going down!"_

"_The two things this world is made of…"_

"_Congratulations Naruto. You Graduate!"_

"…_Love and Peace!"_

Naruto woke up with a start, his sudden motion causing him to hit his desk, knocking over a lamp. This sudden sound caused a cat sitting outside on his balcony to jump, and fall onto a sleeping bum below.

"CAT!"

"I hate having flashbacks in dream sequence," Naruto groaned, "But at least I only remember the important part. Hopefully I'll finally be able to have a dream about something else."

* * *

Chapter 2 end!

AN: Finally! This was hard to write, because I have just discovered I am horrible with fights. And since this is shonen…I am so screwed. Also, forgive me fans of other works, I just am having massive writer's block on all of them, and thus trying to spread my wings and look into other stories until something jogs the brain.

Anyway, I am trying to think of another story idea, and while I do have an idea for a crossover, I still am having problems coming up with something to work with.

BOOM! (Door knocked down)

Who are you?

I am an angry fan, and to punish you for not updating very much, I have decided top punish you with something pure evil.

Oh god, the original Elfin Lied.

No. Something Worse.

You don't mean…

No.

Oh…le gasp.

Yes…HETALIA!

NO! Someone save me from this evil fan girl machine which I have never watched!

Too late, this will punish you for updating so little. HA!

(Update or watch Hetalia)

(Yes, I am actually watching that thing on a dare. Hopefully wonderful amounts of fun cannon fodder comes from it)


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